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All about me... lol

my random thoughts and ramblings

July 26th, 2012

musically dumbfounded... @ 11:15 pm

Current Mood: impressed impressed
Current Music: I feel Fine - Takashi Nagayame

Ok so here it is.. I have a new found love .... his name is Takashi Nagayama... in some circles known as Nagayan... and I am seriously on the verge of fangirling.. for me this is a sad day... lol .. how ever... I'm not disappointed at all in finding the talent of Mr. Nagayama. I was introduced to his work while watching the bleach musicals.. FELL in LOVE with the character he played... then went on to find him in other things... then found out he actually has albums out... Then it was really on... in this blog I'm gonna share a particular song that really grabbed me... it made me realize how differently eastern culture approaches music.. (seen this coming as I've been quickly heading into Utaku land.... god forbid the Doni should land in Utaku land... scary stuff) 

I Feel Fine - Takashi Nagayama

Teach me, How to imagine something,

I have the sky here, and the wind - I'm here,

Tell me, How to imagine something;

There is a world inside my pure heart, that almost distant reality,

Staying like this, without change, like a primary color,

Being able to feel the beauty, like this wonderful star,

The Place that I’m looking for doesn’t exist nowhere is the scenery reflecting in my eyes,

Unsorted an honest heart, I'll think in the person that I love,

If I could be gentle with the other people, then I'll listen to the sound of peace,

But now there is not even the slightest sound,

Teach me, How to fly thorough the sky,

There are wings, you here there but don't, But I already know that,

That’s why I keep walking, continuing step by step, in the world that I was granted,

This invariable and indestructible blue, in the dark and prefabricated sky,

My Destiny's evolution is being carried forward,

 And the value of the human heart is too heavy for me

If I could throw away all that, I've been told, and just remember to always keep walking,

Then I’ll probably be able to trust with open heart,

The Place that I’m looking for doesn’t exist nowhere is just the scenery reflecting in my eyes,

Unsorted an honest heart, I’ll think in the person that I love,

If I could be gentle with the other people, then I’ll just listen to the sound of peace,

But now there is not even the slightest sound,

I feel fine, I feel fine, everything is moving,

I feel fine, I feel fine, everything is moving,

I feel fine, I feel fine, everything is moving,

I feel fine, I feel fine, everything is moving.

The lyrics are AMAZING... in it's original and translated.... so had to share... tell me what you think? what does the writing remind you of? does it set anything off inside you? I would really love to hear others thoughts and ideas on this...

My best to all!!!!


July 5th, 2012

been a longgggg time... @ 10:56 am

it's been 8 months since I posted in here... what the BLEEP is wrong with me!!!!! lol... just kidding... actually it fits because it was about that time I went back to work. well the skinny is I lost that job, and am now seeking another one. serves me right for trying my hand at a sales commission based job. I've had a log on my mind too..  but that is still in progress... been thinking in a couple of directions... going into business for myself... using my formal schooling to manage it lol... (mind you I'm still looking for work in the interum....) also have a prospect to do some voice acting... which is part of the "what's on my mind lately" segment... don't know how exactly I feel about it, could prove fun, but kinda doing that.. really? me? kinda thing. also considering starting up a diabetic blogger with recipes and tricks and get other diabetics to participate, and the final thing... I've been fangirling out... yes I said fangirling... *takes a deep breath and sighs) the bleach musicals... FELL IN LOVE with them.. then found actor who plays hitsuguya was also in Prince of tennis... so watched the movie, and then found the musicals... he is the cutest damn thing. lol.. so yeah .. fangirling it a bit. but the obsession won't last lol... hoping to be back a bit more often. it was just that life thing getting in the way for a bit lol... 

Au Bientot! 

November 1st, 2011

MROW!!!!! screaming MAD.... kinda @ 10:00 pm

ok so things have been really REALLY messed up... with having to move again in less than a month, and school and just coping in general. frustrated to the max, feeling resentful of my brother who can be a real jacktard most of the time and doesn't think about how his action effect others. it's almost 10 and I'm still behind on homework. just BLEH! oh yeah let's not forget that somehow there's a nasty little virus on my laptop that I can't shake.. but I'm fixing that as we speak... just completely reformat and then start the little bugger from scratch! not the preferred method but haven't found any other method to fix it at this point and that's not without trying either. just tired of it. so said .. find with all the energy refocus and redirect. I'm hoping to god that this fixes the problem in a damn hurry cause don't want to deal anymore lmao...

Happy Samhien everyone! 


Writer's Block: Movember is Men’s Health Awareness Month @ 09:56 pm

Who is the most important man in your life?
hmmm good question. and to my eyes.. I actually have 3 whom I consider the most important. my dad, my stepdad, and the man I love. when they hurt, I hurt. when they are sick, it bothers me. they all have a piece of my heart and are extremely important to me.

July 27th, 2011

hell week @ 05:21 pm

 A week until  my birthday.... and true to form it's hell week... i'm hoping for the best, but preparing or the worst.. Josh's birthday (my brother who passed away) is tmw. this is also the anneversary week of my grandfather committing suicide... I know .. sweet of him to do it on my birthday week and make sure that I'm the one who found him.... and the week my very very best friend landed in the hospital... and it turned out to be serious. just to name a few things .... lol... anywho... crossing fingers for the best. can't believe i'll be 37 this year.... what the hell.... lmao...

Au Bientot!

October 31st, 2010

food for thought @ 10:34 am

Current Mood: annoyed annoyed

Got up this morning, started playing around randomly picking articles and stuff... came across am article about "Ghost Hunters" . now I've watched the show for years purely entertainment and out of my fascination with the paranormal / metaphysical. It was an article about a former employee Donna... I was entirely surprised at all the apparent backbiting going on. It shouldn't surprise me really. after all we are talking about entertainment. and true to form for me , I tend to see both sides of the coin. I can see her point about the show selling out, and I have to agree on that.  But it is TV... it IS entertainment... it is to be expected. 

I bring this up because it really made me wonder.. when did we get to this point? when did we get to the point that we "expect" such things to happen. 

September 7th, 2010

things that make you go hmmmm.... kinda? @ 02:32 pm

Current Mood: contemplative contemplative

 feeling odd. about everything lately... just kinda contemplative. but not really in a good way. 

don't know 'bout y'all but I don't like it when I spend a lot of time second guessing myself and analyzing every word / action/ thought...

I'm trying to keep busy so that I'm not thinking so much about things. 

Killing pixels ( IE: playing World of Warcraft... lol) trying to get back into crafting.. and not having much luck there. 
been working my tush off with work and getting ready to go back to school in October. 

bleh... can't even seem to journal much lmao... oh well.. try again laterz 


August 17th, 2010

(no subject) @ 02:00 pm

Current Mood: restless restless

 ok wierdness but that's life right...
got to thinking about something someone very close to me said and it's been running around in my brain for a while now. I was told by this person that the lyrics to body remind him of me. now I know it's a memory association thing in a way. I do it too. there are just songs that irrevocably remind me of people or events. 

grrr was trying to paste the lyrics so that people could see. but I'll just have to type them out I guess...


Hush Child, lay your sweet lips on me
This greed is bigger than you and me
will you come again... body

tongue tied a visceral third degree
feel warm - a center of gravity
wash us all away - body never lies

will you come again
will we stay friends
oh you paralize... oh you paralize

There are times that I wish that I was you
Thick Skinned - the cities you drive me through
Better than me - you're a woman

7 days and my system is free again
we rise - we loose it on oblivion
falling away - I'm sorry for the way
you're child is on fire


lick these ruby lips
we kiss we kiss we kiss
pretty words can never say (repeat 3X)
far away, far away, far away

Will you come again?
we'll stay friends

seems several ways to take this. and I'm doing the WTF? in one light it's very flattering really. in another I'm like... how strange. I love the band bush I really do they have some incredible stuff. but this from a person who NEVER will associate a Bush song with anyone much less a female. (long story on that one, not gonna get into it here) and of all songs this one... just kinda sets me back a second going... whoa.. 

thoughts? I'd really love to here them on this one. becuase it's leaving me a bit perplexed

July 29th, 2010

Writer's Block: Star-crossed @ 10:51 am

Have you ever secretly loved someone you shouldn't have? If so, did you confess your feelings? Any regrets either way?

in fact if one wants to look at it the answer is yes I have loved someone that maybe I shouldn't have. Yes, I did confess my feelings. I can't say that I have any regrets. I never improperly acted on the feelings, and I don't think it was wrong of me to confess what I was feeling. particularly when I received the same response. I've always been one who feels it's best to be honest about things. so...yeah...no regrets :)

July 7th, 2010

Writer's Block: More than words @ 11:25 pm

Which song lyrics send shivers down your spine and really hit you emotionally?

the one that hits me the most is prelude 1221 by AFI. 
the lyrics coupled with the melody just always seem to catch me 
the other one that does it is Love remains the same by Gavin Rossdale. 
I think this one has more to do with my current situation than anything but I hear it and it just shakes me

All about me... lol

my random thoughts and ramblings